Years ago, my sister gave me some advice: care less. It sounds like terrible advice, doesn’t it? Except it isn’t. She was totally right. I used to be super Type A, and if I’m being honest, I still fight those tendencies. I tried to do everything at a vf High Level. I achieved a lot in my career, won a lot of awards, ran many things in my life well. But… I was super stressed and missed a ton of my actual life. The good stuff that really matters. Who am I trying to impress by killing myself studying or running or staying up all night or taking on 85 hobbies? Do I love ALL those hobbies? No, I do not.

I just don’t need to do it all. And I don’t need to be attached to every single thing going the [totally made-up] right way.

At heart, this is about control and insecurity and attention. I want to be The Best and Do It All and Be Involved with Everything Everywhere. It’s exhausting. My sister’s advice stands out to me as some of the best advice I’ve ever received. Sometimes we give everything our “all,” when really our “all” isn’t necessary. Maybe I don’t need to give 100% of my heart and soul and energy to everything. To my kids? yes. To myself? yes. Everything else is just fine with 50-85% effort. It really is. Nothing in this world is worth losing my sanity, self-respect, rest, health, or my precious evening Robe Time. Nothing except a good midnight trashy TV sesh, that is.

The flip of this - maybe it’s about caring more about health and happiness and your life instead of the stuff that doesn’t pass the deathbed test. Maybe this is about choosing to make your life better overall, instead of living in a world of stress and frustration. In the end, there’s almost nothing we can control in life. Actions matter of course, and there are plenty of things I care about - a lot actually - but I don’t need to care so much about most things.

By caring less, I found more faith, more happiness, and more Robe Time - which is really the whole point, isn’t it?